would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Randomize
