the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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