Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
