i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
