Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize