white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
