This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize