I wannas sexs uuuuu
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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