I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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