i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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