do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
it's like iHOP with fire
No subtext here. People are naked.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I'm like, not good at living.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
