got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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