i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
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