if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
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