bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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