So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
