"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
My liver just had a heart attack.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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