dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
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