idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
