Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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