I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Randomize
