i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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