everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
