Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
