It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
