Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
