and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize