in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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