So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
