your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
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