worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Enjoy the penises
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
