I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize