dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
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