No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
