jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
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