there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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