She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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