That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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