So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Randomize
