the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
