An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
