1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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