I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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