you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
soo... how was my night?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize