The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Randomize
