there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
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