Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize