we have officially lost it.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
