NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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