Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
you made out with another girl for some wings
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Randomize