didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
why does every cop we meet know your name?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize