I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
